Wilson in his article points to this description of Dani Alves by Sid Lowe, which is probably the best written anywhere:
And right-wing. And just about everywhere else. Roman Abramovich decided €30m was too much for a defender but Alves is not just a defender. He's a one-man band wearing cymbals on his knees, a drum on his back, Johnny Cash's harmonica strapped to his gob and Barça sweatbands on his wrists like a 10-year-old suffering a Peter Withe fixation. He offers killer passes and crunching tackles: a screeching lunatic kid, perfect technician, tactical genius and - let's face it - sneaky little cheat, all wrapped into one hyperactive ball. A footballing Sonic the Hedgehog.